I Googled the date of this diary post and it’s the day this kid was born. The day I decided to open my heart onto a page, his mum opened her legs in a maternity ward in Loughborough.
Ever since after Christmas I have had a crush on HC. However, she has been rejecting me from then up until 5/3/96 when she asked me to sponsor her in a 24hr famine. That was just after she was right behind me in the dinner queue and she hit me in the back.
I realised I was attracted to her when I walked past RHR (lunch room) and she looked out. I knocked on the window and stared at me as if to say “What is that little * looking at?”
Then we had a year assembly with people who helped us make our (GCSE) choices about a week later. She was right behind me and she called me a mong. The in drama about another week later she called me a geek. I told GB (friend) what had happened and he later informed me that she called me a “pathetic attempt.”
I was confronted by her near the science block at dinner. She was with a friend, I seem to remember and she wanted me to sponsor her. I confronted her coolly, and she told me she was on a 24hr famine.
I said, “er, yeah, how much?”
I said, “er, 10p?”
She raised her eyebrows.
She didn’t say anything, but she just wrote it down. I reached into my pocket and tried to find a coin.
“You don’t have to give it me now,” she said. “Give it me tomorrow.”
The next day I had to give her the money, but I didn’t have the guts. I walked onto the front terrace to see (friends) MB, GB and a couple of others. I told them the problem and MB said “I’ll give it her.”
I said, “No, I’ve got to give it her.” She might call me a mong she realised I didn’t have the guts.
“Go on, you can do it,” he said.
“Yeah, I’m gonna give it her!” I said, slamming my fist into my hand. I walked into the houseblock, took a deep breath and opened the door to R area. She was looking out of the window. Just as usual.
“HC,” I said Confidently. She turned round. “Do you want that sponsor money?”
“Er, no, give it me on Monday.”
I nodded my head and walked out.
I then felt self satisifed for the rest of the week. Ah, cooperation!
Then there was Monday.
I left the situation until dinner. When I had finished my sarnies, I felt self confident enough to give her the money. I did.
She held out her handand I put the 20p coin in, coming into contact with her skin. I was blessed.
“You don’t have to hold my hand,” she said.
Ever since, I have been kicking myself for not saying, “Yes I bl*dy do!”