I still haven’t food-shopped.

I last did a big food shop on 20th December. Then I wrote this ridiculous blog post. The fresh stuff has been long-since eaten, save for a few slices of once-frozen stay-fresh bread. My fridge is empty. I’m out of milk and juice and I’m drinking copious amounts of Ovaltine- something that I’m hoping will inadvertently ease the crippling insomnia I’m plagued with. I got a soup maker for Christmas that I haven’t used yet because it would mean buying ingredients. My mum’s bought me a butternut squash, which would make up 1/3rd of a recipe for this appliance. I still have some freezer goods- breaded cod, mixed veg- but that aside it’s all reduced, dented cans. Around 33 of them. I’m taking soup to work for my lunch and leaving the bread for breakfast toast. It’s fascinating to watch and experience.

There’ll be a point soon when all I have left is rice and pasta, just at a time when I was getting fit too. How long do I do this for? And why? I’ve got money. I can shop at any time. Why am I doing this to myself? Why do I have these random impulses?

I’ve always set myself bizarre challenges. When I was 20 and at uni I attempted to do 40 days 40 nights of no sex. Like in the movie. 

Only thing is, I was a virgin at the time. There was absolutely no point in me doing it whatsoever. My head was so far west and I was so fucked up from mental conditions, stress, education, work, lack of support, lack of direction- that I had no concept of what was appropriate and what wasn’t. I had completely lost the plot. More so once I started the challenge.

Suffice to say, living off the remnants of your cupboard when you’ve got the money to go shopping isn’t as dumb, but it’s on the same wedge. It WILL free up some space, though. I sure do miss the taste of milk!

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