First, I need to check out these Paula Hall online books. She’s doing research on porn addiction, and provides advice.
I’ve just completed a questionnaire that asked about my porn viewing habits, for Hall’s research. (I was rated ‘severe’, unsurprisingly.)
Therapist CK will bring in some printouts next time.
I discussed a habit I have of over-sharing. I told a story about when I went out with CM and I told her a story about when my mate worked as a concierge and found himself in the bathroom of footballer Roy Keane’s flat, and so took the opportunity to have a wank. Not the best story to tell to a fit girl you’re trying to stop from moving to London.
Her advice, which may be obvious to some: if a story goes weird, don’t continue. Just say, “actually, now’s not the time.”
I mentioned that I sometimes make notes about my nights out on my phone while I’m out- mostly for posts like this one. CK suggested I can do that to detail what is happening with women: what kind of conversations I’m having, what happens, what kind of response I’m getting.
When things don’t work out- when women aren’t interested or they don’t text back, stop thinking “it must be about me.” Stop reinforcing this in your mind. Challenge that thought. Your thoughts will dictate your behaviour.
Accept yourself. Yes, like yourself and think positively about yourself too, but in terms of mental health issues or learning difficulties, accept those for what they are. Don’t treat them as a reason for things to go wrong. I mentioned the girl whose name I got wrong and who didn’t want to talk to me due to this- I admitted I wouldn’t want to deal with someone who doesn’t want to listen to me anyway. Hence when I properly accept myself, that situation wouldn’t play on my mind. Think of yourself acceptingly, not just positively.
I’ve been out this weekend but not seen much I like. Neighbourhood was a cock fest on Friday, as was a club I went to last night. A few sights in Alchemist Friday. Lawn Club‘s new Club House extension is a daytime thing, it turns out, so I completely missed that. Must get more weeknight nights out planned.