Friday night- went out with a support group in Manchester. Met a stunner called MMM. Blonde, gorgeous, glamorous. Just what I like. I was brave and pushed the boat out. She was seeing someone though, so it wasn’t going anywhere. Doesn’t sound like it’s too serious with her guy, so I pushed on. Unfortunately I was getting hammered, so I wasn’t on top form, so things didn’t go to plan.
We walked into a bar in town, where the doormen searched me. I had a little pen knife on my keyring which I use for trimming my nails- security wanted it, so I drunkenly handed them my whole set of house keys.
This was my downfall.
We left the bar soon after, and I got a taxi home. I had to stop half way to throw up, something I’d never done mid journey before. The taxi driver was considerate and gave me some water while I churned it all out in the street.
I paid him and staggered to my door. I then couldn’t get in. No keys. Fuck.
Meanwhile this couple approached me- neighbours from down the street- who offered me a bottle of water. I got bad vibes. They were standing too close, and there was something that was sending my instincts signals. They asked me if this flat was mine, and what I was going to do. I told him I was walking to my mums.
I woke my mum up, slept at hers, and the next day she went to the bar and got my keys. I got a lift back. The car was gone from my drive.
I buzzed in and my flat door was unlocked. Clothes strewn all over my bedroom, and no wash basket. They wanted it for something. I walked into the kitchen: shitloads of alcohol gone. 2 watches gone from the bedroom. Keys gone from my computer trolley, along with a pot of coins. Crowbar marks in my kitchen window.
Phoned the police immediately. Cue many phone calls, hung over, to the police, the insurers, the housing people. These calls are still going on, and I’ve had visits from people nailing my windows shut and dusting the place down. The suspects were wearing work boots and work gloves according to forensics.
My memory is obviously hazy, but when I cast my mind back I think the neighbours asked me which flat was mine, and may have mentioned the bottles in my kitchen (which, if the cupboard door is open and my blind is up, can be seen from a footpath around the back). Suffice to say, I’ve moved the remaining bottles into a cupboard in my hall and filled my pantry shelves with cans and cereal.
Last time I saw these neighbours they darted off when my parents turned up.
The insurers have offered me a hire car, and I’m currently waiting for them to come and pick me up.
The Council have nailed my windows shut.
The Police mentioned that the same people, the suspects, had an argument recently and that he may have moved out of her flat. They’ve asked around.
Meanwhile, MMM was messaging a little, but she’s gone quiet. I told the group about the burglary. Dunno what she’s thinking. Hard to tell when she won’t respond, but whatever. Let’s see if she pipes up in group chat.